Some funny review about amazon sex toys

 For the discerning vibrator user there are many, many options available online. 

Which is great, but can also make it difficult to know where to start.

But one woman’s review has bumped a dual purpose clitoral and g-spot to the the number one best seller position for Amazon sex toys, making it the clear and easy choice for anyone who wants their world mechanically rocked.

And if you give it a read you’ll understand why.

The woman in question wrote: 

This rose gold, silicone tipped beauty will make you feel like the Queen you were always meant to be.

You set this bad boy into position and it stays. I'm talking hands free. You can watch your porn, eat a snack, browse Netflix, knit a sweater, whatever you want.

Until 30 seconds later. When you approach orgasm numero uno. It'll be small but powerful. You'll de-clit this so fast you won't even remember what you were doing. Catch your breath. Then think to yourself "just one more won't hurt."

A minute later, numero dos.

By the time you hit number 3, your soul will seperate from your body like some Doctor Strange move.

Now you've reached, the need-an-Excorism level.

Palms sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, weirdly craving spaghetti.

You'll become your biggest cheerleader.

"You're the freaking champion. You're going to cum. You deserve this. You freaking know you do."

"Just one more orgasm, then you're done."

*orgasms*

maniacal laughter "Girl, you know I was lyin. Go again, you bad mamma jamma."

If you've called yourself the champion at least once, you've reached the winners circle of masturbation. It's a small club. Growing by the day thanks to this suction, wave-length, science vibrator.

Another word of cautionIf you think at any point "weird, feels like I can poop right now." DE-FREAKING-CLIT. You will undoubtedly poop yourself. Also, you may passout. I maaaay be speaking from experience.

Proceed with caution.

When I read this review, I just want to say, are you writing an essay?Consumers generally don’t like write long reviews, right? This amazon sex toys review authenticity needs to be studied

The other woman in question wrote: 

Me parece una falta de respeto que no venga en paquete con un cubrecolchón o sábanas nuevas.

Fuera de eso, lo recomiendo ampliamente ¡es mi mejor amigo!.

And her pic is funny

When I see this picture, I want to have this amazon sex toy,,Makes you happy that you can't control yourself.Whether it makes me happy or not, I want to experience it.